Two years ago today, “The Last” was released. What a coincidence that a few weeks ago, one groggy morning, a new revelation about the short randomly came to me as I laid in bed. In the video, I listed out 5 “loves” that influenced the man… but I missed one.
The truth is, I did consider it as I was finishing the script, but left it out on purpose, thinking that it didn’t fit with the structure and the message. But I was wrong.
Who, What, When, Where, Why I love… those are all reactive. Each of those happened to him. They each existed and he took what he wanted. That is the whole angle of the short. The 5 loves, these 5 women, and who/what/when/where/why they affected me. But “How” is totally different. “How” is the way in which I reciprocate. It’s active. It’s what we do together. It might be the most important, and I left it out.
Even when I was thinking about including “how” I thought of it more as a joke. “Oh, ‘How’ I love… heh heh, like… sex”. “How” was only an action, but in fact, it’s much more. I scoffed it off then, but I was actually going down the right track had I just expanded further. Sex > actions > behavior > mindset. And perhaps that’s what I am missing, the proper mindset to love.
Now, when I say that, I don’t mean I haven’t learned how to be intimate, or romantic, or share and communicate in a relationship.. it’s something far deeper. Especially if they are the “Last”, then the “how” becomes much heavier. It actually becomes “how do you love someone forever?” That is the challenge, that is what I struggle with, and maybe many of you do, or will, too.
How do you change with someone while preserving yourself? How do you face challenges without completely compromising? How do you resist temptation yet feed other primal needs? How do you find the love of your life in essentially the first quarter of it? These are the “how’s” that I missed and have yet to understand. All the other 5, I get, I’ve been there and learned from. But how is a new challenge.
I think many of us can get lost in love. Infatuated by the whos/whats/whens/wheres/whys and being so in love with those things, not realizing that those elements can only take us so far. After that, it’s on you, your action, your will… and that’s where the real challenge is. Falling and being in love is easy. Staying in love is something else.
So, I’m sorry everyone. I’m sorry for not giving you a complete package in “The Last”. I mislead you, thinking there was nothing else left. But I was wrong, in perhaps the biggest, heaviest way. I had no idea. But, should I be surprised? It’d be arrogant of me to think I knew it all. Each short film is only a snapshot of my meager understanding of love at the time it was made. I continue to evolve, and so will my work, and in this case.. my understanding of past work. So hopefully someday I can create an addendum.. actually, no. Not hopefully.. I must.